Great "Obituary"

[fabsroman]

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend,
Mr. Common Sense.
Mr. Sense had been with us for many years.

No one knows for sure how old
he was since his birth records were long ago

lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated

such value lessons as knowing
when to come in out of the rain,

why the early bird gets the worm, and
that life isn't always fair.

Common Sense lived by simple,

sound financial policies

(don't spend more than you earn)

and reliable Parenting strategies

(adults, not kids, are in charge).

His health began to rapidly deteriorate

when well intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place.

Reports of a six-year-old
boy charged with sexual harassment

for kissing a classmate;

teens suspended from school for using

mouthwash after lunch;

and a teacher fired for reprimanding an

unruly student,

only worsened his condition.

Mr. Sense declined even further when

schools were required to get parental consent

to administer aspirin to a student;

but could not inform the parents when a student

became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live

as the Ten Commandments became contraband;

churches became businesses;

and criminals received better treatment

than their victims.

Common Sense finally gave up the ghost

after a woman failed to realize that a

steaming cup of coffee was hot,

she spilled a bit in her lap,
and was awarded a huge financial settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust,

his wife, Discretion;

his daughter, Responsibility;

and his son, Reason.

He is survived by two stepbrothers;

My Rights and Ima Whiner.
Not many attended his funeral because

so few realized he was gone.

If you still remember him,

pass this on;

if not, join the majority and do nothing.